hannah's baby shower cake made it onto cake wrecks! inordinately excited about this.
hannah's two-week appointment was yesterday and everything looks good. she has gained a pound over last week and a half an inch over her birth length. the nurse thinks so little because her conehead has disappeared and the extra length from that was probably counted in her 20" birth length; she was probably a little bit less. other than a bad case of diaper rash, she is perfectly healthy and happy.
and not only am i in love with my baby toiletries, but i got props on them from the doctor yesterday! she said specifically that my bum cream was great for her diaper rash, and mentioned that commercial baby wipes can sometimes aggravate diaper rash. i said that we were using cloth wipes instead, wet with either plain water or water with aloe vera gel, which she also heartily approved of. yay for me!
we're trying to start her on a good sleep schedule, but it's difficult. she's only three weeks old, after all. i'm not sure if it's too early to start but i figure we can at least try. i figure she needs to get used to sleeping in her crib, especially at night, and she needs to learn that nighttime is when we sleep and not when we are awake and needing to be cuddled and loved on. not that i don't want to cuddle and love on her, just that i want my sleep as well and the sooner she learns about sleeping at night, the easier life is going to be for mama and daddy and on her in the long run.
in other news, trying not to be too frustrated over brian's response to the baby. he gets very frustrated when she cries, especially when he can't stop it right away. he wants to cuddle her but only when she's quiet, and gets annoyed that "she just wants her mommy." i know he loves her - he's completely smitten - but i think he will like her a lot more when she can respond to him, when he can do something silly and make her smile at him.
Friday, May 29, 2009
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
sort of green baby (so far)
updat on how things sre going on the green baby front:
1. love love LOVE my baby toiletries, especially the bum cream. her poor little crack was getting so red and rashy and in thirteen years she will probably die of embarrassment that her mother mentioned her bottom on the internet. the bum cream came out just the way i wanted it, soft and creamy and hallelujah IT WORKS. she still has a bit of rash (something i am attributing more to the 'sposies than the cream, more on those in a moment) but the majority of it cleared up within a day. i also love the lotion, it is nice and light and not greasy or anything. her feet were a little flaky for some reason and the lotion is very nice on them. and she got her first bath the other day with mom's lavender soap and i am happy to say her skin is as sweet and soft as before. (the evils of soap is a myth perpetuated by cosmetics companies, imho.)
2. love love LOVE her cloth wipes. we have been using them with solution sometimes and just water sometimes, and both i love. sometimes i microwave them for 20-30 seconds so they are warm on her bottom. my mother made them out of an old flannel sheet she had, just cut out squares and serged the edges. they're like little soft washcloths and much more effective than store-bought wipes, maybe because they have a little more texture. the solution i put in a spray bottle for easy dispensing, i also got a mini spray bottle for the diaper bag. so convenient. the only thing with the solution is, i started leaving the calendula oil out of the recipe. i know the idea is that it makes the wipe a little slippery (and thus suposedly easier to use) but it doesn't seem to get on the wipes anyway and they seem to be fine without it. unless i could figure out how to keep it in solution with the water, i think it will stay out. normally one would use polysorbate 20, but i'd rather stay away from the synthetic stuff for the moment.
3. not completely discouraged by breastfeeding, it's getting better. i tried pumping yesterday for the first time and can i just say, GET A HANDS-FREE PUMP. i have a medela pump in style which i thought worked pretty awesome, granted i have only used it the once but DAYUM i got 4½ ounces out of it in the one sitting. maybe that is not awesome but it was to my uneducated mind. i was so proud to see that little bottle sitting there in my fridge. my, how my priorities have changed. but, HECK. how in the world are you supposed to change the settings et cetera if you are holding both bottles to your boobs? i only have so many hands, people. jaimey, i am taking your advice and cutting up an old bra.
4. cloth diapers. ohh, sigh. not loving them. i think it is more the style/pattern of the diaper than the fact that it is cloth. my mother has been making them and if we are going to continue to use this pattern it is going to need some major tweaking. more elastic in the legs and across the back, but especially in the legs. a bit wider in the crotch, to accomodate the "pad." and the ones she made with plastic liner just don't work... if any flannel gets wet outside the liner, the moisture just seeps all across the outside. the minky/pul ones she made work WAY better. or maybe we just have to find another pattern. i'm not ready to give up on cloth just yet, even though brian insists he "cannot" change her when she is wearing a cloth diaper. in the meantime we are using these new huggies pure & natural 'sposies. as far as 'sposies go i rather like them. they're just so soft. i don't want hannah to wear anything i wouldn't want to wear if i were a baby, and these are just so soft and gentle against her skin.
1. love love LOVE my baby toiletries, especially the bum cream. her poor little crack was getting so red and rashy and in thirteen years she will probably die of embarrassment that her mother mentioned her bottom on the internet. the bum cream came out just the way i wanted it, soft and creamy and hallelujah IT WORKS. she still has a bit of rash (something i am attributing more to the 'sposies than the cream, more on those in a moment) but the majority of it cleared up within a day. i also love the lotion, it is nice and light and not greasy or anything. her feet were a little flaky for some reason and the lotion is very nice on them. and she got her first bath the other day with mom's lavender soap and i am happy to say her skin is as sweet and soft as before. (the evils of soap is a myth perpetuated by cosmetics companies, imho.)
2. love love LOVE her cloth wipes. we have been using them with solution sometimes and just water sometimes, and both i love. sometimes i microwave them for 20-30 seconds so they are warm on her bottom. my mother made them out of an old flannel sheet she had, just cut out squares and serged the edges. they're like little soft washcloths and much more effective than store-bought wipes, maybe because they have a little more texture. the solution i put in a spray bottle for easy dispensing, i also got a mini spray bottle for the diaper bag. so convenient. the only thing with the solution is, i started leaving the calendula oil out of the recipe. i know the idea is that it makes the wipe a little slippery (and thus suposedly easier to use) but it doesn't seem to get on the wipes anyway and they seem to be fine without it. unless i could figure out how to keep it in solution with the water, i think it will stay out. normally one would use polysorbate 20, but i'd rather stay away from the synthetic stuff for the moment.
3. not completely discouraged by breastfeeding, it's getting better. i tried pumping yesterday for the first time and can i just say, GET A HANDS-FREE PUMP. i have a medela pump in style which i thought worked pretty awesome, granted i have only used it the once but DAYUM i got 4½ ounces out of it in the one sitting. maybe that is not awesome but it was to my uneducated mind. i was so proud to see that little bottle sitting there in my fridge. my, how my priorities have changed. but, HECK. how in the world are you supposed to change the settings et cetera if you are holding both bottles to your boobs? i only have so many hands, people. jaimey, i am taking your advice and cutting up an old bra.
4. cloth diapers. ohh, sigh. not loving them. i think it is more the style/pattern of the diaper than the fact that it is cloth. my mother has been making them and if we are going to continue to use this pattern it is going to need some major tweaking. more elastic in the legs and across the back, but especially in the legs. a bit wider in the crotch, to accomodate the "pad." and the ones she made with plastic liner just don't work... if any flannel gets wet outside the liner, the moisture just seeps all across the outside. the minky/pul ones she made work WAY better. or maybe we just have to find another pattern. i'm not ready to give up on cloth just yet, even though brian insists he "cannot" change her when she is wearing a cloth diaper. in the meantime we are using these new huggies pure & natural 'sposies. as far as 'sposies go i rather like them. they're just so soft. i don't want hannah to wear anything i wouldn't want to wear if i were a baby, and these are just so soft and gentle against her skin.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
this is why i blog
thank you so much for the encouragement regarding the meds and breastfeeding. i tend to be prone to uti's so we've been flushing with cranberry juice (kelly, i LOVE that trader joe's juice straight up, no water) since monday, and now who knows what it is really since my culture came back clear, yet i have all the classic symptoms. this whole postpartum thing has just all been somewhat discouraging, which i did not expect. i'm thinking this is similar to my meltdown when i was pregnant: i just did not expect it to be this hard.
i did not expect breastfeeding to be so difficult. breast is best, everyone knows that - and if it's so natural and this is what my body was designed to do, and kiddo and i were designed to work together, then why would it be hard? but it is. (and thank you jaimey for confirming that i am not insane for thinking that.) i'm getting used to that, and getting used to that makes it easier to handle and more enjoyable, especially when she wants to eat and i want to sleep. which is like ALL THE TIME.
i did not expect to need pain meds for so long. i realized today that i think i'm one of those people who just doesn't know how to sit still. i'm happiest when i'm working on a project or two or twelve. i don't know how many times during my pregnancy my doctor and my husband and my mother and who knows all else told me to slow down and take it easy. i don't know what that means. i go out of my head "taking it easy." my mother and i are both convinced that i am mildly adhd, and if there had been such a diagnosis and treatment for it when i was a kid, i would have gotten the full course. unfortunately mildly adhd does not mesh well with recovery from major abdominal surgery. so i'm probably overdoing it some or a lot. besides, asking for more pain meds makes me feel like such a junkie, hence the guilt.
i'm not sure if any of this will make sense to anyone reading. i feel so sleep deprived lately and yet oddly hyperactively energetic. i'm convinced letdown stimulates some sort of hormone that puts one to sleep, because every time she latches on i nod off. if it does make sense, well then... good. and thanks again, because i am encouraged by you.
i did not expect breastfeeding to be so difficult. breast is best, everyone knows that - and if it's so natural and this is what my body was designed to do, and kiddo and i were designed to work together, then why would it be hard? but it is. (and thank you jaimey for confirming that i am not insane for thinking that.) i'm getting used to that, and getting used to that makes it easier to handle and more enjoyable, especially when she wants to eat and i want to sleep. which is like ALL THE TIME.
i did not expect to need pain meds for so long. i realized today that i think i'm one of those people who just doesn't know how to sit still. i'm happiest when i'm working on a project or two or twelve. i don't know how many times during my pregnancy my doctor and my husband and my mother and who knows all else told me to slow down and take it easy. i don't know what that means. i go out of my head "taking it easy." my mother and i are both convinced that i am mildly adhd, and if there had been such a diagnosis and treatment for it when i was a kid, i would have gotten the full course. unfortunately mildly adhd does not mesh well with recovery from major abdominal surgery. so i'm probably overdoing it some or a lot. besides, asking for more pain meds makes me feel like such a junkie, hence the guilt.
i'm not sure if any of this will make sense to anyone reading. i feel so sleep deprived lately and yet oddly hyperactively energetic. i'm convinced letdown stimulates some sort of hormone that puts one to sleep, because every time she latches on i nod off. if it does make sense, well then... good. and thanks again, because i am encouraged by you.
Friday, May 22, 2009
add one more to the list
i'm trying very hard not to feel guilty about having requested more pain meds at this morning's doctor appointment. seems we are making a daily pilgrimage to the clinic for one reason or another these days - brian had an eye appointment, hannah has her weight issues, and me - well, i'm just a mess. as if labor and delivery weren't enough, i now also have a urinary tract infection. joy!
before we left the hospital my doctor wrote me a prescription for norco, which is similar to vicodin but has less acetaminophen. it's working well at controlling the pain from my cesarean, but i was down to the last couple pills, and when i slept through my reminder alarm and woke up in quite a bit of pain i decided that maybe now was not quite the best time to try to wean myself off of it. i'd rather not be taking highly addictive narcotics, but i'd rather more not experience the pain just yet. i've just had major abdominal surgery, thank you very much. i don't understand these women who go through this postpartum recovery basically without pain meds. one of my girlfriends only took vicodin for the first day after all three of her cesareans. another took only ibuprofen afterwards. i admire them for being able to do that because i'm no hero. the twinges and cramps send me crying into brian's arms. so we got more norco.
speaking of cramping, i thought we were done with that. i thought we had 2-3 days of afterpains and then my uterus would be relatively shrunk back to size and no more cramps. turns out i am not necessarily wrong in this, but lucky me, i have something else going on altogether: the day after hannah was born, the doctor came to me in the hospital and asked if i knew that i had uterine fibroids. i said yes, they've been there for a while and my ob can feel them, she just keeps an eye on them. they're small. he said, um, not exactly. apparently when he opened me up he found a fibroid the size of a baseball sitting on top of my uterus. he did not remove it because there was a risk of vascular problems and too much bleeding as my uterus contracted. also, removal would weaken that area of my uterus and i would be at a much higher risk of uterine rupture during labor for the next kiddo. so unless it starts causing me problems (i'm thinking that's unlikely as i didn't even know it was there until now) then it stays in until we are 100% sure we are done having children. and here brian and i thought it was hannah's bottom the whole time.
the fibroid shouldn't really cause any problems anyway, he said - i might have more cramping and heavier flow when i have my period. big deal. i've had that all my life. the only "problem" it is currently causing is these abdominal cramps. fibroids are apparently very sensitive to estrogen, so it was hanging out and getting fat and happy while i was pregnant and making estrogen like there was no tomorrow. once hannah was born, my estrogen production dropped like a mob man with cement shoes. as a result the fibroid is probably shrinking and causing my cramps.
the urinary tract infection is lots of fun because i can't feel anything down there. i've heard this is not uncommon after vaginal births. granted, i didn't have one, but since i pushed for almost 3 hours i get to claim vaginal birth aftereffects. i don't feel that pressure and urgency when i need to go, so i have to keep reminding myself to head to the bathroom every couple hours. but! not to worry! i can still feel that resistance to go, and the burning. yay! i was put on keflex for the uti, which should be an interesting experience as i've never taken it. usually i get cipro instead, because i'm allergic to the sulfa drugs that are commonly used to treat uti's. however, cipro does turn up in breastmilk and can cause problems for baby so keflex it is.
the printout of my "active medications" includes my prenatal vitamin (huh?) and is a bit horrifying to me:
- prenatal vitamin once a day
- motrin every 8 hours
- norco every 4 hours
- keflex twice a day
- stool softener twice a day
- nor-q-d (minipill birth control) once a day
i feel like my grandparents, with 86 pills spread before me at the breakfast table.
before we left the hospital my doctor wrote me a prescription for norco, which is similar to vicodin but has less acetaminophen. it's working well at controlling the pain from my cesarean, but i was down to the last couple pills, and when i slept through my reminder alarm and woke up in quite a bit of pain i decided that maybe now was not quite the best time to try to wean myself off of it. i'd rather not be taking highly addictive narcotics, but i'd rather more not experience the pain just yet. i've just had major abdominal surgery, thank you very much. i don't understand these women who go through this postpartum recovery basically without pain meds. one of my girlfriends only took vicodin for the first day after all three of her cesareans. another took only ibuprofen afterwards. i admire them for being able to do that because i'm no hero. the twinges and cramps send me crying into brian's arms. so we got more norco.
speaking of cramping, i thought we were done with that. i thought we had 2-3 days of afterpains and then my uterus would be relatively shrunk back to size and no more cramps. turns out i am not necessarily wrong in this, but lucky me, i have something else going on altogether: the day after hannah was born, the doctor came to me in the hospital and asked if i knew that i had uterine fibroids. i said yes, they've been there for a while and my ob can feel them, she just keeps an eye on them. they're small. he said, um, not exactly. apparently when he opened me up he found a fibroid the size of a baseball sitting on top of my uterus. he did not remove it because there was a risk of vascular problems and too much bleeding as my uterus contracted. also, removal would weaken that area of my uterus and i would be at a much higher risk of uterine rupture during labor for the next kiddo. so unless it starts causing me problems (i'm thinking that's unlikely as i didn't even know it was there until now) then it stays in until we are 100% sure we are done having children. and here brian and i thought it was hannah's bottom the whole time.
the fibroid shouldn't really cause any problems anyway, he said - i might have more cramping and heavier flow when i have my period. big deal. i've had that all my life. the only "problem" it is currently causing is these abdominal cramps. fibroids are apparently very sensitive to estrogen, so it was hanging out and getting fat and happy while i was pregnant and making estrogen like there was no tomorrow. once hannah was born, my estrogen production dropped like a mob man with cement shoes. as a result the fibroid is probably shrinking and causing my cramps.
the urinary tract infection is lots of fun because i can't feel anything down there. i've heard this is not uncommon after vaginal births. granted, i didn't have one, but since i pushed for almost 3 hours i get to claim vaginal birth aftereffects. i don't feel that pressure and urgency when i need to go, so i have to keep reminding myself to head to the bathroom every couple hours. but! not to worry! i can still feel that resistance to go, and the burning. yay! i was put on keflex for the uti, which should be an interesting experience as i've never taken it. usually i get cipro instead, because i'm allergic to the sulfa drugs that are commonly used to treat uti's. however, cipro does turn up in breastmilk and can cause problems for baby so keflex it is.
the printout of my "active medications" includes my prenatal vitamin (huh?) and is a bit horrifying to me:
- prenatal vitamin once a day
- motrin every 8 hours
- norco every 4 hours
- keflex twice a day
- stool softener twice a day
- nor-q-d (minipill birth control) once a day
i feel like my grandparents, with 86 pills spread before me at the breakfast table.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
breast vs. formula (my experience thus far)
only 8 days old and already life with hannah is an adventure. we had our two-day checkup on friday (15) afternoon and it turns out she is losing weight. we knew this already and that night began supplementing with a little bit of formula. i did not want my baby to be formula-fed but i wanted her admitted even less, which is what the pediatrician needed to do if her weight did not turn around fast.
i was kind of feeling discouraged and all about the whole breastfeeding thing anyways. i am not planning on giving up... just discouraged. i did not make it through 12 hours of HARD labor with no drugs just to complain about a couple sore nipples. besides we don't have the money to throw away on formula all the time. i am planning/hoping to breastfeed for a year or longer if i can. besides i did not have problems with engorgement when my milk came in thank the Lord, so how could i throw away THAT gift and decide to go to formula?
i honestly did not know what was wrong when i started feeding and it hurt. all the classes and books and websites say breastfeeding should not hurt, if it does you are doing something wrong. and it didn't hurt, at least not right away. but by thursday (14) when we went home from the hosptal it did. i told the lactation lady who came in to my room to help me before we left, and she helped but it still hurt. i didn't tell her though, i felt like it must be me if she was making the latch and standing over me making sure i was doing it right and it still hurt. now i think maybe she didn't know well enough what she was doing. then we went for our 2-day appointment with the doctor - usually that one is with a nurse practitioner so she can be sure you are feeding properly because pediatric doctors don't get a lot of training in breastfeeding but pediatric nurse practicioners do for some reason. that was when we found out hannah was SO down on weight, and the doctor recommended supplementing with a little formula. all babies lose some of their birth weight but hannah had lost a lot. 14 oz. in 4 days which was 12% of her birthweight and the doctors do not want to see more than 7% lost. they were ready to admit her if something did not turn around asap which is why the pediatrician suggested supplementation. i did not want to because i did not want her to get used to the (easy) bottle nipple and then not want to suck from mama, because boob sucking is harder than bottle sucking.
(aside: did you ever think i'd be discussing "boob sucking?" i never thought "boob" would become such a "normal" part of my vocabulary, personally.)
so brian went and got some formula. i had him get the liquid kind, smallest bottle he could, because i did not want to mix powders and i thought she might take it better than powder anyways. like how chocolate milk you buy in a refrigerated carton is WAY better than chocolate milk you make from powder. we had a coupon but still, i do not even want to know how much it cost. the liquid formula is more expensive than the powder so it must have been like gold.
we only gave her one ounce on friday night but she did not feed well when i tried later that night. THAT was discouraging, but i did not know then that formula keeps them fuller longer. i think it probably has more calories and less water. (because you can give a formula baby a teeny bit of water in the summer when it is so hot, but you can't a bf baby because they get all the fluids they need from breastmilk and can get an electrolyte imbalance.) it was nice that night to give my boobs a break - and then that night my milk came in. other than that she fed fine and when the nurse practitioner saw her on saturday (16) she had put on 3.5 oz. overnight. she said, otherwise how are things going? and i grabbed my boobs and said, sore, the usual, but otherwise fine. she said, would you like me to show you how to breastfeed her without it hurting AT ALL?
well heck, lady, when you put it like that... does the sun rise in the east?
she said usually babies have the reflex down okay but sometimes they don't know exactly what to do, and moms sure don't, so don't beat yourself up over it. i guess whatever she was doing was pulling on my nipple which caused the soreness and also the cracking/bleeding at the end. and she is not supposed to do that, but f she is not latched on properly sh will in order to get enough milk. i am still not quite sure what is different except in how i hold her back now, but i can feel she is not pulling on me and the cracking/bleeding is all healed on one side and almost all healed on the other. and let me tell you it is so nice to be able to feed your kid without dreading it. except that now i dread it at night because it means less sleep.
we gave her another ounce of formula sunday (17) night. she had another checkup with the pediatrician yesterday, and she had put on another 3 ounces! the doctor said if we only gave her 2 ounces formula and she gained 6.5 ounces in 3 days, that is DEFINITELY my milk (my milk had not yet come in when we first saw the pediatrician on friday) and good breastfeeding. i could sure tell when my milk came in. it is nice to know that for sure i have enough for her because she is putting on weight.
so now there is the rest of a 24-ounce bottle of similac in my fridge and can I tell you how tempting it is at 3 am? breastfed babies only sleep about 2-3 hours at a stretch because breastmilk is so easily digested and they are that hungry sooner. formula babies sleep 4+ hrs at a stretch i guess. and last night, like the night before and the night before that, I could NOT for the life of me get her to sleep in her pack & play. i personally was fine with her sleeping on my chest but brian did NOT want that because what if she rolled off, and i was sleeping HARD at that point so i would not necessarily wake up and notice. he had a point so i tried not to sleep with her on me but often i just dozed off, because when i'd put her in the pack & play (asleep) she would wake up and cry, LOUD. i finally got her to last night, yay me! brian stayed up with me to give me some moral support since it's not like he can feed her. but then about 230 am she was awake again and we heated up about 1/2 ounce of formula hoping it would be little enough to not affect her feeding and big enough to get her to sleep a little extra. we caved. i think she slept about 2 hours (in her crib! or maybe on brian?) and man did i need that. i'm such a better mommy when i have some slep under my belt.
i was kind of feeling discouraged and all about the whole breastfeeding thing anyways. i am not planning on giving up... just discouraged. i did not make it through 12 hours of HARD labor with no drugs just to complain about a couple sore nipples. besides we don't have the money to throw away on formula all the time. i am planning/hoping to breastfeed for a year or longer if i can. besides i did not have problems with engorgement when my milk came in thank the Lord, so how could i throw away THAT gift and decide to go to formula?
i honestly did not know what was wrong when i started feeding and it hurt. all the classes and books and websites say breastfeeding should not hurt, if it does you are doing something wrong. and it didn't hurt, at least not right away. but by thursday (14) when we went home from the hosptal it did. i told the lactation lady who came in to my room to help me before we left, and she helped but it still hurt. i didn't tell her though, i felt like it must be me if she was making the latch and standing over me making sure i was doing it right and it still hurt. now i think maybe she didn't know well enough what she was doing. then we went for our 2-day appointment with the doctor - usually that one is with a nurse practitioner so she can be sure you are feeding properly because pediatric doctors don't get a lot of training in breastfeeding but pediatric nurse practicioners do for some reason. that was when we found out hannah was SO down on weight, and the doctor recommended supplementing with a little formula. all babies lose some of their birth weight but hannah had lost a lot. 14 oz. in 4 days which was 12% of her birthweight and the doctors do not want to see more than 7% lost. they were ready to admit her if something did not turn around asap which is why the pediatrician suggested supplementation. i did not want to because i did not want her to get used to the (easy) bottle nipple and then not want to suck from mama, because boob sucking is harder than bottle sucking.
(aside: did you ever think i'd be discussing "boob sucking?" i never thought "boob" would become such a "normal" part of my vocabulary, personally.)
so brian went and got some formula. i had him get the liquid kind, smallest bottle he could, because i did not want to mix powders and i thought she might take it better than powder anyways. like how chocolate milk you buy in a refrigerated carton is WAY better than chocolate milk you make from powder. we had a coupon but still, i do not even want to know how much it cost. the liquid formula is more expensive than the powder so it must have been like gold.
we only gave her one ounce on friday night but she did not feed well when i tried later that night. THAT was discouraging, but i did not know then that formula keeps them fuller longer. i think it probably has more calories and less water. (because you can give a formula baby a teeny bit of water in the summer when it is so hot, but you can't a bf baby because they get all the fluids they need from breastmilk and can get an electrolyte imbalance.) it was nice that night to give my boobs a break - and then that night my milk came in. other than that she fed fine and when the nurse practitioner saw her on saturday (16) she had put on 3.5 oz. overnight. she said, otherwise how are things going? and i grabbed my boobs and said, sore, the usual, but otherwise fine. she said, would you like me to show you how to breastfeed her without it hurting AT ALL?
well heck, lady, when you put it like that... does the sun rise in the east?
she said usually babies have the reflex down okay but sometimes they don't know exactly what to do, and moms sure don't, so don't beat yourself up over it. i guess whatever she was doing was pulling on my nipple which caused the soreness and also the cracking/bleeding at the end. and she is not supposed to do that, but f she is not latched on properly sh will in order to get enough milk. i am still not quite sure what is different except in how i hold her back now, but i can feel she is not pulling on me and the cracking/bleeding is all healed on one side and almost all healed on the other. and let me tell you it is so nice to be able to feed your kid without dreading it. except that now i dread it at night because it means less sleep.
we gave her another ounce of formula sunday (17) night. she had another checkup with the pediatrician yesterday, and she had put on another 3 ounces! the doctor said if we only gave her 2 ounces formula and she gained 6.5 ounces in 3 days, that is DEFINITELY my milk (my milk had not yet come in when we first saw the pediatrician on friday) and good breastfeeding. i could sure tell when my milk came in. it is nice to know that for sure i have enough for her because she is putting on weight.
so now there is the rest of a 24-ounce bottle of similac in my fridge and can I tell you how tempting it is at 3 am? breastfed babies only sleep about 2-3 hours at a stretch because breastmilk is so easily digested and they are that hungry sooner. formula babies sleep 4+ hrs at a stretch i guess. and last night, like the night before and the night before that, I could NOT for the life of me get her to sleep in her pack & play. i personally was fine with her sleeping on my chest but brian did NOT want that because what if she rolled off, and i was sleeping HARD at that point so i would not necessarily wake up and notice. he had a point so i tried not to sleep with her on me but often i just dozed off, because when i'd put her in the pack & play (asleep) she would wake up and cry, LOUD. i finally got her to last night, yay me! brian stayed up with me to give me some moral support since it's not like he can feed her. but then about 230 am she was awake again and we heated up about 1/2 ounce of formula hoping it would be little enough to not affect her feeding and big enough to get her to sleep a little extra. we caved. i think she slept about 2 hours (in her crib! or maybe on brian?) and man did i need that. i'm such a better mommy when i have some slep under my belt.
Monday, May 18, 2009
on being completely unprepared
i told one of my girlfriends the "true" story of my labor (as opposed to the laugh-it-off, "she didn't want to come out" story) and she commented that it sounded so scary. she is about 5 months along and wanted the "gory details." i commented back that it was really not scary and that i did not want her to be scared. and that was true, most of hannah's labor was really not so scary to me. i had somewhat anticipated it being terrifying, and had also anticipated feeling out of control and lost, and none of those things really materialized. i think it might have been because we took every childbirth class that was offered by my medical group. i also read all the books and reread all the stuff about labor and delivery in the two weeks before we had her, to remind me of everything. i had prepared myself and in that "moment of truth" (the entire labor process!) my preparation kept my fears at bay.
the things that were scary to me were the things i had not anticipated or prepared for. being catheterized, for example: i wasn't going to need to be catheterized, because i was going to be up and walking around and certainly would get to pee. i wasn't going to need vacuum extraction, because i wasn't going to get an epidural if i could possibly help it, and slow down my own labor and therefore need further interventions like the vacuum. i didn't know they strap down your legs when they perform a c-section.
and then i had to get in that bed to be monitored, and i rolled onto my side to get more comfortable, and after managing through a couple contractions like that, i didn't want to get out of bed (except to get in the shower, which brian made me get out of too soon). and therefore didn't pee, and had to be catheterized. and even though i didn't do anything to slow down my own labor, i didn't anticipate that maybe hannah and i were just not compatible and i might still need the vacuum extraction. (which did not actually scare me in and of itself - but the pudendal block did.) and they do strap down your legs, like in a bad horror movie. no one told me that.
even the failed spinal block, the failed epidural, and the cesarean section did not scare me, but i think at that point i was too exhausted to be afraid. i just wanted it OVER at that point. the only nerve-wracking part of that is that brian could not be with me, and that was all i wanted.
he and i took a little walk around the corridors tuesday night, or rather he put one foot slowly in front of the other and i sort of leaned against him for support and shuffled along. mil was with the baby back in our room and the halls were quiet because visiting hours had ended (but they let mil stay longer). we finally got a chance to be alone together and talk quietly about this whole ordeal we had both just gone through. i told him about everything that happened once they wheeled me away from him, about alexis the nurse who stayed with me the entire time - just stood next to me and kept her hands on my hip and my shoulder and encouraged me through the contractions. her only role in that room, at least while i was awake, was to be moral support for me, and i told him how i appreciated it since he couldn't be there. i told him how they made me sign a cesarean consent form right there on the operating table. i was curled on my side and the anesthetist was poking my back, and i was trying to lay still while blowing through a contraction so he wouldn't paralyze me forever, and some woman shoved a pen in my hand and said, i'm sorry to ask you this right now but we have to get your consent to perform this cesarean so could you please sign right here. i told him how they put those compression pads on my legs but then they had to strap my legs down, and how i felt like i was in an old-timey psych ward, and i was having a contraction and trying to blow through it and trying not to be scared of what they would do next once i was strapped down and couldn't run away and could someone please explain why they had not knocked me out yet?
he told me all the things he had been thinking about and feeling and doing all day long, and filled me in on what happened to him when they took me away. the last i saw of brian before we became parents was him putting on a blue plastic shirt (and pants, i presume) over his tee shirt, so he could be in the or with me once the spinal was in place. my mom had arrived from san diego by then (mil was there the whole time, bless her) and they were all anxious to hear how i was doing, and then a nurse came out and told brian he would have to wait, they had trouble with the spinal block and i needed general anesthesia, and he was so worried about me and the baby. he told me how even though he was insanely worried, he was also glad they were doing the c-section, because labor had been so tough and he wanted it to be over with for my sake. he told me how amazed and proud he was all day, because i was so tough and managed to labor drug-free up until the very end, and he had not expected that as i generally don't handle pain well. he told me how sweet i was even during labor, because i didn't once yell at him and i even told him how i appreciated him being there and helping me, and i only brushed off his touch once at the very end. he told me he appreciated the doctor who suggested the c-section and didn't like the nurse who yelled "you can do it, come on erin!" through each push, because even brian could see that the baby wasn't coming when i pushed.
i knew having this child and going through labor together would bring us closer together, because we (i) would be going through physical things that no man should have to deal with from his wife. trying to push a baby out often pushes poop out and no husband should have to see his wife undignified and pooping on the delivery table. here's your child honey and also some of my poop. all that moaning and grunting and exertion, no man should have to hear his wife make those noises (unless he's in bed with her!). no man should have to watch his wife go through that much pain and suffering, because he has to stand idly by and just watch, knowing there is nothing he can do to help her. brian said he hated that he could only watch me go through those contractions, because if he could have he would have taken all that pain upon himself so i wouldn't suffer.
i was completely unprepared for the level of emotional intimacy that labor provides. i had expected just the opposite. all those (medical) people watching and all that uncouth behavior. i did tell brian that i only wanted him in the room when i delivered - no moms, not my sister, no one but him and the medical personnel, because i thought delivery should be a special thing for mom and dad only. but then, special goes out the window right about the time you're trying to push your baby out and you realize there is a cluster of about eight blue-suited nurses and doctors standing at the end of your bed watching.
then the contraction ended, and i let go of my legs and fell back on the bed and looked up at my husband. he was smiling, and it was our baby i was trying to have, and he pushed my hair back and got me ice chips and told me he loved me, and i realized it was special and intimate, and i loved him right back.
the things that were scary to me were the things i had not anticipated or prepared for. being catheterized, for example: i wasn't going to need to be catheterized, because i was going to be up and walking around and certainly would get to pee. i wasn't going to need vacuum extraction, because i wasn't going to get an epidural if i could possibly help it, and slow down my own labor and therefore need further interventions like the vacuum. i didn't know they strap down your legs when they perform a c-section.
and then i had to get in that bed to be monitored, and i rolled onto my side to get more comfortable, and after managing through a couple contractions like that, i didn't want to get out of bed (except to get in the shower, which brian made me get out of too soon). and therefore didn't pee, and had to be catheterized. and even though i didn't do anything to slow down my own labor, i didn't anticipate that maybe hannah and i were just not compatible and i might still need the vacuum extraction. (which did not actually scare me in and of itself - but the pudendal block did.) and they do strap down your legs, like in a bad horror movie. no one told me that.
even the failed spinal block, the failed epidural, and the cesarean section did not scare me, but i think at that point i was too exhausted to be afraid. i just wanted it OVER at that point. the only nerve-wracking part of that is that brian could not be with me, and that was all i wanted.
he and i took a little walk around the corridors tuesday night, or rather he put one foot slowly in front of the other and i sort of leaned against him for support and shuffled along. mil was with the baby back in our room and the halls were quiet because visiting hours had ended (but they let mil stay longer). we finally got a chance to be alone together and talk quietly about this whole ordeal we had both just gone through. i told him about everything that happened once they wheeled me away from him, about alexis the nurse who stayed with me the entire time - just stood next to me and kept her hands on my hip and my shoulder and encouraged me through the contractions. her only role in that room, at least while i was awake, was to be moral support for me, and i told him how i appreciated it since he couldn't be there. i told him how they made me sign a cesarean consent form right there on the operating table. i was curled on my side and the anesthetist was poking my back, and i was trying to lay still while blowing through a contraction so he wouldn't paralyze me forever, and some woman shoved a pen in my hand and said, i'm sorry to ask you this right now but we have to get your consent to perform this cesarean so could you please sign right here. i told him how they put those compression pads on my legs but then they had to strap my legs down, and how i felt like i was in an old-timey psych ward, and i was having a contraction and trying to blow through it and trying not to be scared of what they would do next once i was strapped down and couldn't run away and could someone please explain why they had not knocked me out yet?
he told me all the things he had been thinking about and feeling and doing all day long, and filled me in on what happened to him when they took me away. the last i saw of brian before we became parents was him putting on a blue plastic shirt (and pants, i presume) over his tee shirt, so he could be in the or with me once the spinal was in place. my mom had arrived from san diego by then (mil was there the whole time, bless her) and they were all anxious to hear how i was doing, and then a nurse came out and told brian he would have to wait, they had trouble with the spinal block and i needed general anesthesia, and he was so worried about me and the baby. he told me how even though he was insanely worried, he was also glad they were doing the c-section, because labor had been so tough and he wanted it to be over with for my sake. he told me how amazed and proud he was all day, because i was so tough and managed to labor drug-free up until the very end, and he had not expected that as i generally don't handle pain well. he told me how sweet i was even during labor, because i didn't once yell at him and i even told him how i appreciated him being there and helping me, and i only brushed off his touch once at the very end. he told me he appreciated the doctor who suggested the c-section and didn't like the nurse who yelled "you can do it, come on erin!" through each push, because even brian could see that the baby wasn't coming when i pushed.
i knew having this child and going through labor together would bring us closer together, because we (i) would be going through physical things that no man should have to deal with from his wife. trying to push a baby out often pushes poop out and no husband should have to see his wife undignified and pooping on the delivery table. here's your child honey and also some of my poop. all that moaning and grunting and exertion, no man should have to hear his wife make those noises (unless he's in bed with her!). no man should have to watch his wife go through that much pain and suffering, because he has to stand idly by and just watch, knowing there is nothing he can do to help her. brian said he hated that he could only watch me go through those contractions, because if he could have he would have taken all that pain upon himself so i wouldn't suffer.
i was completely unprepared for the level of emotional intimacy that labor provides. i had expected just the opposite. all those (medical) people watching and all that uncouth behavior. i did tell brian that i only wanted him in the room when i delivered - no moms, not my sister, no one but him and the medical personnel, because i thought delivery should be a special thing for mom and dad only. but then, special goes out the window right about the time you're trying to push your baby out and you realize there is a cluster of about eight blue-suited nurses and doctors standing at the end of your bed watching.
then the contraction ended, and i let go of my legs and fell back on the bed and looked up at my husband. he was smiling, and it was our baby i was trying to have, and he pushed my hair back and got me ice chips and told me he loved me, and i realized it was special and intimate, and i loved him right back.
Friday, May 15, 2009
hannah's birth story
she is probably the absolute most beautiful thing i have ever seen. aside from a bit of conehead i think i am not biased when i say that. just a pretty girl in her mama's eyes.
monday was obviously a very rough day. i had my first contraction at 4a and by 6a they were about 10 minutes apart. i got in the shower around 745a and my water broke at 830a. so we went to the hospital. brian was very anxious that we were not going soon enough. by about 930a when we got there the contractions were 2-3 minutes apart, 45-60 seconds long, and i was dilated to 4 centimeters. btw that 2-3 minutes apart is NOT from the end of one to the start of the next, oh no. that would be too much rest. the way you time a contraction is from the start of one to the start of the next. (i did not know this until our childbirth class.) so really only like 1-2 minutes rest. and you would not believe the words and noises that come out of your body during a contraction. they had told us the (private, thank heaven) birthing rooms were soundproof but according to my mil, she could hear me screaming and swearing through each contraction.
by about 230p i was 10 centimeters dilated and ready to start pushing. they gave me fentanyl also at about 9 centimeters, an iv drug to take the edge off. i wanted to try to do the whole thing 100% natural but it just did not happen. the contractions still hurt like a mother after the fentanyl but were no longer pass-out pain is all. brian was such an awesome coach, i could not have done it without him. i pushed for about 2+ hrs and she was just not coming. "failure to progress" is what they called it. so they put a vacuum cup on her head to try to help. hence the conehead, and she also has some scabby scratches on the top of her head from the vacuum cup. they also gad to catheterize me just before because i had not peed all day and a full bladder can hinder the vacuum apparently. that was about the worst thing ever, it hurt so bad. brian kept me focused on him but he said the look on my face broke his heart. he also said he could tell how much it hurt and that he dd not realize until then how tough i was. i generally have a relatively low pain tolerance.) i was begging them not to but they had to. then they also gave me two shots, one on either side, i guess for a pudendal block maybe? the doctor said to ease the pain as she came out on the vacuum, i guess it hurts more. i do remember at one point the vacuum popped off her head. i remember the doctor pulling hard as i was pushing too but nothing, she failed to progress.
i think i pushed about 30-45 minutes vwith the vacuum but she was just not coming so the doctor said they needed to get me in for an emergency cesarean. i was tired and baby was tired and nothing was happening. i asked brian afterwards if he could even see anything when i was pushing (like the top of her head) and he said no. i was actually kind of relieved about the cesarean because i just wanted the whole done with at that point. so they wheeled me away to do a spinal block (faster than an epidural) while brian got suited up.
they poked my back for about 15 minutes but it was not taking, i was not getting any pain relief. i counted at least seven poke bruises on my spine yesterday. in the meantime i was having contractions and curled on my side, as much as i could be with a baby between my legs and the doctor is saying hold still so i can do this. what?! a man of course. they also tried an epidural but it did not take either. after about 20 minutes i said, PLEASE can you just do general (which they don't like as much because it is more risk to the baby). but they did. they had to catheterize me again for the cesarean, but it was a different kind of catheter so did not hurt as bad THANK THE LORD. i said, can you PLEASE catheterize me after you put me under, and they said, i'm sorry but no, as soon as you are under we have to get the baby out.
they had to strap my legs down, i guess so i wouldn't go flopping everywhere in the middle of a contraction while i was under anesthesia. that was VERY scary. the worst was, brian could not be there with general anesthesia, so i was alone with all those nurses and doctors the whole time i was in the operating room, and all i wanted was him.
they had to intubate me also so my voice is scratchy and my throat hurts even four days later. i guess they put me under about 545p (i know they wheeled me into the or about 5p) and hannah was born at 6p on the dot. 8 pounds 0 ounces, and 20 inches long. brian saw her pretty much as soon as she got out, they cut her cord and then took her away to get a bath and such while they stitched me up. she is all red and wailing in those first pictures he took. he said she just wanted her mom and to feed. i started coming around about 7p and i think they brought her to me around 730p and she just went to town breastfeeding.
so that us where we are right now, we got home yesterday afternoon. i have not slept much of course and my abdomen hurts of course, to be expected when they cut it open to remove an 8 pound baby, but still. she has her days and nights reversed right now so sleeps too much during the day and feeds too much at night. i guess most babies are like that at first. she also has so far lost too much weight (14 ounces in 4 days) so we have to supplement with formula for the next few days until my milk comes in and she is getting enough nutrition from me. fortunately that is the only thing "wrong" with her. her bilirubin levels are great, no jaundice, and all her scores and vitals have otherwise been fabulous.
all strapped in and ready to go home, swimming in her sleeper
we are so in love with her. i never thought i could be so happy about being "replaced" in my husband's heart, but i am just over the moon that brian is so starry-eyed over her. i never thought i could so love a little human who s making such demands on my time, energy, and body. and i never realized how much i could trust and appreciate the man who got me through this whole thing - pregnancy, labor, delivery, who is taking such good care of me right now as i'm recovering not only from a (mostly) regular birth but also from major abdominal surgery. i never thought i could love brian more than i did before this experience. he saw me go through things, say and do things that a husband should not have to see and hear and experience from his wife, and i should be ashamed and embarrassed, and i'm not. i can't imagine having done this whole thing with anyone else, and i wouldn't want to.
cross-posted at éireann
monday was obviously a very rough day. i had my first contraction at 4a and by 6a they were about 10 minutes apart. i got in the shower around 745a and my water broke at 830a. so we went to the hospital. brian was very anxious that we were not going soon enough. by about 930a when we got there the contractions were 2-3 minutes apart, 45-60 seconds long, and i was dilated to 4 centimeters. btw that 2-3 minutes apart is NOT from the end of one to the start of the next, oh no. that would be too much rest. the way you time a contraction is from the start of one to the start of the next. (i did not know this until our childbirth class.) so really only like 1-2 minutes rest. and you would not believe the words and noises that come out of your body during a contraction. they had told us the (private, thank heaven) birthing rooms were soundproof but according to my mil, she could hear me screaming and swearing through each contraction.
by about 230p i was 10 centimeters dilated and ready to start pushing. they gave me fentanyl also at about 9 centimeters, an iv drug to take the edge off. i wanted to try to do the whole thing 100% natural but it just did not happen. the contractions still hurt like a mother after the fentanyl but were no longer pass-out pain is all. brian was such an awesome coach, i could not have done it without him. i pushed for about 2+ hrs and she was just not coming. "failure to progress" is what they called it. so they put a vacuum cup on her head to try to help. hence the conehead, and she also has some scabby scratches on the top of her head from the vacuum cup. they also gad to catheterize me just before because i had not peed all day and a full bladder can hinder the vacuum apparently. that was about the worst thing ever, it hurt so bad. brian kept me focused on him but he said the look on my face broke his heart. he also said he could tell how much it hurt and that he dd not realize until then how tough i was. i generally have a relatively low pain tolerance.) i was begging them not to but they had to. then they also gave me two shots, one on either side, i guess for a pudendal block maybe? the doctor said to ease the pain as she came out on the vacuum, i guess it hurts more. i do remember at one point the vacuum popped off her head. i remember the doctor pulling hard as i was pushing too but nothing, she failed to progress.
i think i pushed about 30-45 minutes vwith the vacuum but she was just not coming so the doctor said they needed to get me in for an emergency cesarean. i was tired and baby was tired and nothing was happening. i asked brian afterwards if he could even see anything when i was pushing (like the top of her head) and he said no. i was actually kind of relieved about the cesarean because i just wanted the whole done with at that point. so they wheeled me away to do a spinal block (faster than an epidural) while brian got suited up.
they poked my back for about 15 minutes but it was not taking, i was not getting any pain relief. i counted at least seven poke bruises on my spine yesterday. in the meantime i was having contractions and curled on my side, as much as i could be with a baby between my legs and the doctor is saying hold still so i can do this. what?! a man of course. they also tried an epidural but it did not take either. after about 20 minutes i said, PLEASE can you just do general (which they don't like as much because it is more risk to the baby). but they did. they had to catheterize me again for the cesarean, but it was a different kind of catheter so did not hurt as bad THANK THE LORD. i said, can you PLEASE catheterize me after you put me under, and they said, i'm sorry but no, as soon as you are under we have to get the baby out.
they had to strap my legs down, i guess so i wouldn't go flopping everywhere in the middle of a contraction while i was under anesthesia. that was VERY scary. the worst was, brian could not be there with general anesthesia, so i was alone with all those nurses and doctors the whole time i was in the operating room, and all i wanted was him.
they had to intubate me also so my voice is scratchy and my throat hurts even four days later. i guess they put me under about 545p (i know they wheeled me into the or about 5p) and hannah was born at 6p on the dot. 8 pounds 0 ounces, and 20 inches long. brian saw her pretty much as soon as she got out, they cut her cord and then took her away to get a bath and such while they stitched me up. she is all red and wailing in those first pictures he took. he said she just wanted her mom and to feed. i started coming around about 7p and i think they brought her to me around 730p and she just went to town breastfeeding.
so that us where we are right now, we got home yesterday afternoon. i have not slept much of course and my abdomen hurts of course, to be expected when they cut it open to remove an 8 pound baby, but still. she has her days and nights reversed right now so sleeps too much during the day and feeds too much at night. i guess most babies are like that at first. she also has so far lost too much weight (14 ounces in 4 days) so we have to supplement with formula for the next few days until my milk comes in and she is getting enough nutrition from me. fortunately that is the only thing "wrong" with her. her bilirubin levels are great, no jaundice, and all her scores and vitals have otherwise been fabulous.
all strapped in and ready to go home, swimming in her sleeper
we are so in love with her. i never thought i could be so happy about being "replaced" in my husband's heart, but i am just over the moon that brian is so starry-eyed over her. i never thought i could so love a little human who s making such demands on my time, energy, and body. and i never realized how much i could trust and appreciate the man who got me through this whole thing - pregnancy, labor, delivery, who is taking such good care of me right now as i'm recovering not only from a (mostly) regular birth but also from major abdominal surgery. i never thought i could love brian more than i did before this experience. he saw me go through things, say and do things that a husband should not have to see and hear and experience from his wife, and i should be ashamed and embarrassed, and i'm not. i can't imagine having done this whole thing with anyone else, and i wouldn't want to.
cross-posted at éireann
hannah jeanne
was born on monday may 11 (her due date!) at 6pm. she was 8 lbs. 0 oz. and 20 ins long. she is the most beautiful thing we have ever seen. we all came home from the hospital thursday afternoon.
photos and her birth story to come, it was quite the ordeal. we tried a little bit of pretty much everything just to meet this kiddo.
cross-posted at éireann
photos and her birth story to come, it was quite the ordeal. we tried a little bit of pretty much everything just to meet this kiddo.
cross-posted at éireann
Saturday, May 9, 2009
this is what my life is reduced to.
waiting. just... waiting.
i gave myself a pedicure this morning, an effort that involved much bending and huffing and contortions of the legs and torso. sounds a lot more sexy than it really was, trust me. given how swollen my feet are, i think this is a bit like putting lipstick on a pig, but.
in the meantime, we sit around and wait.
we are at: 39 weeks 5 days.
i gave myself a pedicure this morning, an effort that involved much bending and huffing and contortions of the legs and torso. sounds a lot more sexy than it really was, trust me. given how swollen my feet are, i think this is a bit like putting lipstick on a pig, but.
in the meantime, we sit around and wait.
we are at: 39 weeks 5 days.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
baby watch: 5 days left
i think i'm ready to meet this kiddo. if only to get rid of the interstate road map of veins that is my entire body.
this afternoon doc said baby had dropped a tiny bit, maybe 1 cm, and i was approximately 50% effaced. so: i could go into labor this weekend, or not for another two weeks. she's not concerned as baby seems healthy (nice strong heartbeat and still moving just as furiously as ever) and i'm healthy, so i'm not concerned. at this moment she's willing to let me go a full two weeks past my due date, which would be may 25 before she would recommend induction.
in other news, i am apparently not completely insane for thinking my feet are hugely and grotesquely swollen. my legs are as well and doc said my swelling is some of the worst she has seen. yay! she commented that she was impressed that i had not really complained about it. i haven't to her, because what can she do? although i did ask the nurse last time if maybe she could just lance them, like a blister or something?
we are at: 39 weeks 2 days.
this afternoon doc said baby had dropped a tiny bit, maybe 1 cm, and i was approximately 50% effaced. so: i could go into labor this weekend, or not for another two weeks. she's not concerned as baby seems healthy (nice strong heartbeat and still moving just as furiously as ever) and i'm healthy, so i'm not concerned. at this moment she's willing to let me go a full two weeks past my due date, which would be may 25 before she would recommend induction.
in other news, i am apparently not completely insane for thinking my feet are hugely and grotesquely swollen. my legs are as well and doc said my swelling is some of the worst she has seen. yay! she commented that she was impressed that i had not really complained about it. i haven't to her, because what can she do? although i did ask the nurse last time if maybe she could just lance them, like a blister or something?
we are at: 39 weeks 2 days.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
nesting like nobody's business
and the nursery is FINALLY done! well, except for one piece of artwork, but that can certainly wait. i love her room:
this is what i did for my birthday: hung the shelf over her dresser, painted and assembled the shelves in her closet, set up the pack & play downstairs, and cooked like a madwoman. i also did laundry and some light cleaning, the usual weekend chores. my coworkers also took me out to lunch on friday and brian took me to lunch on saturday. we are both pretty beat lately, him from work and me from being pregnant, that neither one of us had the energy to make a big to-do for my birthday. i didn't really mind because of all those things that were nagging at me to get done before the kiddo arrives, and i'm generally happiest working on a project or six. thank heavens for this manic nesting energy or nothing would be done.
my freezer is also (i hope) fully stocked for the next few weeks. brian does not cook at all and while he can happily eat fast food and take-out for every meal, i would prefer something healthier and home-cooked. now in my freezer there are currently three turkey dinners (turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, and vegetables), six turkey pot pies, three bacon & leek quiches, two lasagnas (including a vegetarian one in case kiddo is here when my sister comes over), and one dish of stuffed shells. this is in addition to our usual assortment of chicken, ham, steak, fish, and frozen vegetables that i can pull out and thaw at a moment's notice. my mother told me that when i was born, she and my father ate from their freezer for six weeks. dad only had to go to the store for milk and lettuce. six weeks is a lot to live up to, i don't know if we will make it that far, but i'm trying. so now all brian has to do is take something out of the freezer in the morning, leave it to defrost, and stick it in the oven. i even wrote instructions on the labels.
i'm sure i could find more to do, but i think i'm going to go put my feet up with a good book or watch a movie. besides, brian is bringing me home a baskin robbins milkshake and i don't want to miss that.
we are at: 38 weeks 6 days.
cross-posted at éireann
this is what i did for my birthday: hung the shelf over her dresser, painted and assembled the shelves in her closet, set up the pack & play downstairs, and cooked like a madwoman. i also did laundry and some light cleaning, the usual weekend chores. my coworkers also took me out to lunch on friday and brian took me to lunch on saturday. we are both pretty beat lately, him from work and me from being pregnant, that neither one of us had the energy to make a big to-do for my birthday. i didn't really mind because of all those things that were nagging at me to get done before the kiddo arrives, and i'm generally happiest working on a project or six. thank heavens for this manic nesting energy or nothing would be done.
my freezer is also (i hope) fully stocked for the next few weeks. brian does not cook at all and while he can happily eat fast food and take-out for every meal, i would prefer something healthier and home-cooked. now in my freezer there are currently three turkey dinners (turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, and vegetables), six turkey pot pies, three bacon & leek quiches, two lasagnas (including a vegetarian one in case kiddo is here when my sister comes over), and one dish of stuffed shells. this is in addition to our usual assortment of chicken, ham, steak, fish, and frozen vegetables that i can pull out and thaw at a moment's notice. my mother told me that when i was born, she and my father ate from their freezer for six weeks. dad only had to go to the store for milk and lettuce. six weeks is a lot to live up to, i don't know if we will make it that far, but i'm trying. so now all brian has to do is take something out of the freezer in the morning, leave it to defrost, and stick it in the oven. i even wrote instructions on the labels.
i'm sure i could find more to do, but i think i'm going to go put my feet up with a good book or watch a movie. besides, brian is bringing me home a baskin robbins milkshake and i don't want to miss that.
we are at: 38 weeks 6 days.
cross-posted at éireann
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